Zochitika za Ava

Dzina langa ndi Ava. Ndinakhala Mboni ya Yehova yobatizidwa mu 1973, chifukwa ndimaganiza kuti ndapeza chipembedzo choona chomwe chikuyimira Mulungu Wamphamvuyonse. Mosiyana ndi ambiri a inu omwe munakulira m'bungweli, ndinakulira m'banja lomwe linalibe chitsogozo chauzimu chilichonse, kupatula kuti anandiwuza kuti ndine Mkatolika, chifukwa abambo anga omwe sanali ochita anali amodzi. Kumbali imodzi sindinkadziwa kuti banja lathu linkapezekapo pa Misa ya Chikatolika koma sindinkadziwa chilichonse chokhudza Baibulo, koma ndili ndi zaka 12, ndinayamba kufunafuna Mulungu m'zipembedzo zosiyanasiyana. Kufufuza kwanga cholinga, tanthauzo, komanso chifukwa chake pali zoipa zambiri padziko lapansi, sikunathe. Pofika zaka 22, wokwatiwa, komanso mayi wamapasa - wamwamuna ndi wamkazi - ndinali munthu wopanda vuto woti ndimuphunzitse, ndipo a JW anali ndi mayankho ake - ndimaganiza choncho. Mwamuna wanga sanavomereze ndipo adatha kupeza ntchito zofalitsa za Russell ndi Rutherford kudzera mwa mlongo wachikulire wa JW panthawiyo, motero adatsutsa m'bale ndi mlongo yemwe amaphunzira nane.

Ndikukumbukira, panthawiyo, kuwafunsa za maulosi ambiri omwe analephera, koma ndinakumana ndi cholinga chofuna kundisokoneza ndikundiwopseza ndi lingaliro loti Satana ndi ziwanda zake anali akugwira ntchito kusokoneza ndikulandila choonadi - kumvetsa chisoni mzimu kuti lankhulani. Anandiuza kuti ndiponye nyimbo zathu zonse m'zinyalala, popeza anali otsimikiza kuti zolembedwazo ndizovuta; zinthu zija ndi zinthu zina zochepa zomwe mwina zabwera kunyumba kwathu kuchokera kwa anthu omwe mwina akukhulupirira mizimu. Ndikutanthauza, ndimadziwa chiyani?! Amawoneka odziwa zambiri. Iyi inali nthawi yoyamba kumva za Satana ndi ziwanda zake. Zachidziwikire, ndikusunga mawu okhutiritsa motere, bwanji ndingawatsutsenso.

Chaka chotsatira, ndinali ndikupita kumisonkhano yonse ndikuchita nawo ntchito yolalikira. Ndimakumbukira bwino fiasco ya 1975. Chilichonse — zomwe timaphunzira m'buku, magazini athu Nsanja ya Olonda ndi Mtolankhani—lolunjika pa tsikulo. Ndikukumbukira kuti ndinamva Fred Franz pamsonkhano woyamba umene ndinapitako. Ndinali wakunja ndikumvetsera nthawi imeneyo. Kunena tsopano kuti bungweli silinaphunzitse ndikuphunzitsanso malowo ndikukhulupirira kuti ndi bodza lamkunkhuniza.

Pokhala watsopano, ndinasokonekera mosavuta m'malingaliro awo a nthawi imeneyo, ngakhale sindinali wotsimikiza kwathunthu. Chifukwa ndinali khanda m'choonadi, adandiwuza kuti ndisunge mpaka mzimuwo utandimvetsetsa. Ndidakhulupirira kuti, poganiza kuti ndipatsidwa chidziwitso ndikamapita patsogolo mchowonadi. Ndinamvera mosazindikira.

Ndimayesetsa kuti ndikhale mgulu lomwe limawoneka kuti limakhazikika m'mabanja okhazikika. Ndinali wosiyana ndipo ndimamva kuti sindimayenera kukhala nawo, ndipo ndimakhulupirira kuti mwamuna wanga atangoona 'chowonadi' ndikupanga chake, mapemphero anga achisangalalo amayankhidwa. Nditha kusangalala ndi ubale wapamtima womwe mabanjawa anali nawo ndi mabanja awo odzipereka. Ndimakumbukira ndikumverera ngati mlendo ndikufuna kukhala wosasangalala, wotetezeka momwe ndimaganiza kuti ena ali nawo. Ndinkafuna kukhala m'banja latsopanoli, chifukwa ndinasiya banja langa chifukwa choona choonadi. (Mgodi wanga sunali wofunda komanso wosakhazikika)

Mwanjira ina, ndinkangokhalira kuvutika —ndisanachite chilichonse. Ndidakhulupirira kuti vuto ndimali. Komanso, ndinali ndi vuto lalikulu lomwe sindinawululepo aliyense panthawiyo. Ndinkachita mantha kulalikira kunyumba ndi nyumba. Ndinachita mantha mpaka chitseko chinatseguka, osadziwa chomwe chinali kuseli kwake. Ndinkachita mantha. Ndinkaganiza kuti payenera kuti pali china chake cholakwika ndi chikhulupiriro changa, popeza sindinathe kuletsa mantha omwe amayamba pomwe ndimayenera kupita khomo muutumiki.

Sindinadziwe kuti vutoli linali ndi zoopsa zochokera pachiyambi kuyambira ndili mwana. Mkulu wina wopanda chifundo kwambiri adazindikira izi ndipo adandiseka chifukwa cholephera kuthana ndi mantha anga. Anandichezera ndikundiuza kuti Mzimu Woyera sukugwira ntchito mwa ine, ndikuti ndikhoza kukhala woipa, motsogozedwa ndi Satana. Zinandipweteka kwambiri. Kenako anandiuza kuti ndisanene za kubwera kwawo kwa ena. Mkulu wosadziwa uyu anali wokalamba komanso woweluza kwambiri. Pambuyo pake, ndidamuuza mkulu yemwe ndimamulemekeza, koma nditangochoka pagulu. Anachitidwa naye nthawi imeneyo. Moona mtima, ndimawona ngati nthawi yomwe akhungu amatsogolera akhungu. Tonsefe tinali akhungu komanso osazindikira.

Ana anga anayi adawona kuti chipembedzocho ndi chamanyazi chomwe chidawapangitsa kuti azimva kuti sali m'gulu lawo. Iwo anali osiyana ndi ana ena onse (omwe si a JW) omwe amapita nawo kusukulu. Adatembenuka atangofika msinkhu, (zaka zoyambirira zaunyamata) chifukwa samazikhulupirira konse. Ana anga ndiwowoneka bwino kwambiri komanso opambana pasukulu, ndipo lingaliro losapeza maphunziro apita kusekondale ndikungokhala wantchito kuti azipeza ndalama, m'maganizo mwawo, ndi misala. Inde, mwamuna wanga wophunzira kwambiri ankamvanso chimodzimodzi. Kukula m'mabanja ogawanika kunali kwamavuto ena, ndipo amadzimva kuti akumanidwa ubwana wabwinobwino.

Ndinali nditathedwa nzeru ndipo ndinapempha thandizo kwa akulu anawo ali aang'ono. Banja labwino, amishonale omwe adabwerera kwawo kuchokera ku Pakistan, adatenga ana anga ndikuwaphunzira mokhulupirika, amawasamalira ngati kuti ndi awo, ndipo amandithandiza nthawi zonse ndikamalimbana ndi moyo wanga kuti ndikwaniritse.

Chifukwa chake inde, pali anthu owona mtima, okongola omwe amakondadi Atate ndi mwana wawo wamwamuna ndipo amapereka nthawi yawo pantchito yachikondi. Chifukwa cha iwo ndidakhala nthawi yayitali. Pambuyo pake, ndidayamba kuwona kuwalako. Makamaka nditasamukira ku Kelowna. BC Ndidalowa mgululi ndichikhulupiliro chakuti ndikakumana ndi "chikondi" chomwe ndi chizindikiritso cha Akhristu owona. Izi sizinali choncho.

Ndikuzindikira kuti panali anthu abwino, ndipo chifukwa cha anthu oona mtimawo komanso oona mtima, ndidakhala zaka 23 mgululi, ndikuganiza kuti ndiyesetsa kwambiri, ndipo zonse ziyenda bwino ndikangodikira Yehova. Ndinkanena kuti zomwe ndimachita ndi anthu opanda ungwiro, sindinaganize kuti bungweli ndi labodza. Ngakhale nditakhala zaka 20 ndisanakhalepo, sindinanenepo kanthu motsutsana ndi Bungwe Lolamulira, poopa kuti ndimalakwitsa pakuwunika kwanga, ndipo sindidzakhululukidwa. Kuopa kukhala wampatuko.

Zonse zidasintha nditaphunzira zaka zingapo zapitazo kuti Bungwe Lolamulira lili ndi a de A facto mfundo yoti asamapereke ziphuphu kwa akuluakulu aboma. Ozunzidwa ambiri tsopano akufuna kuti apite poyera kuti ateteze ena onga iwo. Akufuna kuti azikhala ndi udindo komanso ndalama zolipirira chithandizo chofunikira kwambiri chomwe pamapeto pake chidzawononga ndalama zochepa. Zimatenga zaka kuti mupezenso bwino kutengera momwe zinthu zilili. Izi zidandichititsa chidwi monga momwe muwonera.

Ndisanaphunzire izi, sindimayang'ana pa intaneti kuti ndiwerenge zomwe enawo akunena za bungweli. Mbale Raymond Franz adandigwira, chifukwa cha kusachita bwino kwake kuweruza komanso kuwona mtima konse pomwe amalankhula za ena, kuphatikiza Bungwe Lolamulira. Ndidayesetsa kuti tsiku lina ndiyang'ane mawu angapo m'buku lake ndipo ndinadabwa ndi kuwona mtima komanso kudzichepetsa kwa ndemanga zake. Ameneyu sanali wampatuko. Uyu anali wofunafuna choonadi; munthu amene molimba mtima anayimira chilungamo, zivute zitani.

Pambuyo pake ndinachoka mu 1996 ndipo ndinasiya mwakachetechete osanena chifukwa chake. Nditachezeredwa patatha chaka chimodzi ndi mkulu yemwe ndimamulemekeza, komanso woyang'anira dera, ndidamuyankha kuti, "Sindingakwanitse. Sindingathe kulalikira khomo ndi khomo chifukwa chavuto langa." Ndidati abale ndi alongo amawerengedwa kuchuluka kwa nthawi yomwe amakhala muutumiki wakumunda ndipo amaweruzidwa kuti ndi ofooka ngati sangakwanitse kuchita zina zonse. Kenako adayesetsa kunditsimikizira kuti ndimasowa komanso kukondedwa kwambiri, ndipo ndidati, "Izi sizomwe ndakumana nazo; osati pamene ndimapita kumisonkhano, osati pano. Amanditaya pafupifupi pafupifupi mamembala onse chifukwa chosiya kupita kumisonkhano ikuluikulu. Chimenecho si chikondi. ”

Sindinachite cholakwika chilichonse, komabe ndinaweruzidwa kuti ndine wosayenera kuvomerezedwa. Zopatsa chidwi! Uku kunali kunditsegulira diso. Anthu ena amene ndimaweruza milandu kwambiri ndi a Mboni za Yehova. Ndikukumbukira kuti ndinali muutumiki ndi mpainiya wolemekezedwa kwambiri yemwe, atatuluka pagalimoto ya "osakhala kunyumba" yomwe inali ndi carport yoyipa, adati, "O chabwino, sitikufuna anthu osokonekera chonchi mu gulu lathu loyera tsopano, sichoncho? ” Ndinadabwa!

Sindinatchulepo za ulosi womwe unalephera wa 1975, kapena chiphunzitso cholephera cha m'badwo wa 1914, kapena mfundo yoti mwana yemwe amachitira nkhanza ana amakhala pafupi ndi ine pamsonkhano wachigawo, wachinyamata wina atamuzunza akulu mu mpingo wathu — zomwe adalephera kukanena kwa akuluakulu !. Izi zinandiopsa. Ndidauzidwa za nkhanzazo kudzera mwa mnzake wapabanja wabanjali. Ndinkadziwa kuti msungwanayu ndi womuzunza (yemwe ndimamva kuti ndi wosadalirika, kuyambira tsiku loyamba lomwe ndinakumana naye). Chifukwa chake adakhala pansi, ndi gulu lonse la abale ndi alongo ndi ana awo omwe sanadziwe chilichonse za izi. Koma ndidatero.

Ndinatuluka pamsonkhanowo ndikulira, osabweranso Munthu ameneyo adakhalabe mu mpingo ndipo palibe amene adadziwa, kupatula ochepa omwe adauzidwa kuti asauze ena. Ameneyo anali mu mpingo wa Westbank, tawuni yaying'ono kunja kwa Kelowna. Panthawiyi ndinali ndikukhala ku Kelowna. Nditachoka, ndinazindikira chifukwa chake ndinakhudzidwa kwambiri ndi zimenezi ndipo zinandipangitsa kuti ndisadzalowenso muholo yamsonkhano kapena m'Nyumba Yaufumu.

Chifukwa ndimatha kuzikwanitsa, ndidalowa mu kusanthula kwa ma psycho kuti ndifike ku muzu wa mantha anga. Ndidachedwetsa izi kwa zaka 25 chifukwa a JW adakhumudwitsidwa kupita kwa akatswiri akudziko monga amisala kapena akatswiri amisala .. Sanayenera kudalirika. Pokhapokha pakufunika kuti mankhwala azigwira ntchito bwino.

Mofulumira Pitani.

Sindinauzeko aliyense zomwe zandichitikira ndili ndi zaka zisanu zokha - kungomuuza mwamuna wanga, yemwe adandiyimira, kenako abale anga, pomwe ndimamasulira zomwe sindingaganizire. Ndinkakhala m'tawuni yaying'ono ya Langley BC pafamu yamaekala asanu ndipo ndinkakonda kusewera m'nkhalango ndi mchimwene wanga ndi mlongo wanga kumayambiriro kwa makumi asanu. Monga mukudziwira, m'masiku amenewo palibe amene ankalankhula za ana omwe amachitira ana zachipongwe - ana anga sanalankhulepo. Ndani angaganize kuti chinthu choyipa chotere chitha kuchitika m'tauni yaying'ono yakumidzi ngati Langley. Tonsefe tinkaona kuti ndife otetezeka.

Tsiku lina, ndili ndi mchimwene wanga ndi mlongo wanga kusukulu, ndinali kuyenda ndekha kunyumba kuchokera kwa oyandikana nawo kwambiri pafupi ndi njira yayikulu yamatchire pomwe bambo wina adalumphira kuseri kwa mtengo waukulu ndikundigwira. Woyandikana naye, nkhalamba, adamva kufuula kwanga ndipo adabwera akuthamanga kapena ndinganene kuti ndikungosewerera. Izi zidapulumutsa moyo wanga, koma osati mantha azomwe wolakwirayo adandichitira ine asanandipulumutse. Munthuyo anathawa.

Mwachangu.

Amayi anga adakana, chifukwa amawopa momwe anthu angawone kuti alephera ngati mayi womuteteza. Iye anali kunyumba panthawiyo. Chifukwa chake, adayimitsa nkhani yonseyo ngati kuti sinachitikepo — kunalibe apolisi, kunalibe madokotala, kulibe chithandizo. Ngakhale banja langa silinadziwe mpaka 2003. Amadziwa kuti china chake chinali cholakwika chifukwa umunthu wanga wonse udasintha. Zinandipweteka kwambiri moti ndinali kugwedezeka mwamphamvu ndili mwana ndipo sindinkatha kulankhula, monga momwe ndinaphunzirira pambuyo pake kwa amayi anga.

Mwachangu.

Zotsatira za zomwe zidandichitikirazi zidandichititsa mantha kuti ndikakhala ndekha panja, kunyumba kwanga, komanso m'malo ena ambiri. Ndinali nditasintha. Nthawi zambiri ndimakhala mtsikana wofunda komanso wansangala, ndinkachita manyazi ndikuopa mdima. Mantha anali mnzanga wanthawi zonse. Ma psyche anga adatsekereza kukumbukira kwanga kuti ndipulumuke zoopsa ndi zowawa zake, kuti ndikhale ndi moyo. Ndinkakhala motsutsana, mosazindikira mobwerezabwereza. Zosaneneka zinali zitandichitikira. Munthu ameneyo anali kudwala kwambiri.

Mwachangu.

Adapitilizabe kugawana msungwana wina yemwe amakhala mtunda wa mailosi kutali ndi mseu; anamunyamula m'galimoto yake, napita naye kunyumba kwake, kumumenya, kumugwirira kenako ndikumupha, kubisala mtembowo mtunda wamakilomita ochepa kuchokera kunyumba kwathu. Munthu ameneyo dzina lake anali Gerald Eaton, ndipo anali m'modzi mwa amuna omaliza kupachika ndere ku 1957 pakupha anthu ku BC

Zinanditengera zaka 20 kuti ndichotse izi ndikuchiritsa. Ana ambiri mdziko lino lapansi amavutika ndi zovuta zankhondo, kugwiriridwa komanso ukapolo wogonana. Awonongeka kotero chiyembekezo chokha chakuchiritsidwa kwathunthu chidzachokera kwa Ambuye wathu Yesu Khristu. Ndipamene ndidatembenukira kwa Yesu Khristu kuti ndikadzichiritse pomwe mantha anga adakhala mbiri yakale. Ana otayika ndi ozunzawa m'mbiri yonse mpaka nthawi ya kubwerera kwa Khristu onse adzakhala ndi nkhani zawo zosapilira kuti tidzamve tsiku lina. Sindimawona zokumana nazo zanga kuyerekeza ndi zina. Ana omwe amazunzidwa mobwerezabwereza amatsekedwa ngati anthu.

Pakadali pano, kuchitira nkhanza ana kumakhala patsogolo pamabungwe achipembedzo. Pomaliza!

Sindingathe kudziwa kusowa kwa zochita zowononga omwe ali mgulu la Mboni za Yehova, kapena momwe mipingo masiku ano ikupitilira ngati kuti palibe chomwe chachitika, ngakhale pali umboni wonse pa intaneti. Mayesero enieni alipo kuti onse amve ndi kuwerenga. Kodi chifundo kapena chikondi chikupezeka kuti pachithunzipa? Zowononga izi sizingakhale zakupha, koma kuwonongeka komwe zimayambitsa matenda amisala kwa moyo wawo wonse. Amawononga miyoyo. Izi ndizodziwika bwino.

Kodi izi sizikumveka ngati nkhani yanga mukamawerenga Lipoti lomaliza la ARC kukhala Mboni za Yehova?

Nditakumana ndi amayi anga ku 2003, adachita ngati Bungwe Lolamulira. Zonse zinali za iye. Kenako anandiuza chala chake nati "Ndakuwuza kuti usalole aliyense kukukhudza!" (Sanandiuze kuti ndili mwana, koma kundiimba mlandu mwanjira ina, m'malingaliro ake, zidapangitsa kuti mayendedwe ake asakhale olakwika?) Amadzidera nkhawa kwambiri komanso momwe angawonekere.

Zachidziwikire, zomwe zidachitikira Caroline Moore wazaka 7 mwina zikadapewedwa amayi anga akanakauza Easton kwa olamulira ndipo nawonso, adachenjeza anthu ang'onoang'ono. M'zaka zimenezo zinali zodziwika kuti kuimba mlandu mayi akagwiriridwa, ndakhala ndikuuzidwa. Adafunsa. Kenako imaphimbidwa, ngati kungatheke. Umu ndimo munalinso chitetezo cha m'bale yemwe anazunza mtsikana wachichepere ku Westbank. M'bale ameneyo anali ndi zaka makumi anayi, mwamunayo. Komanso, kodi m'modzi mwa omwe amamuzunza ku Australia sanaimbe mlandu wovulalayo chifukwa chovala zovala zam'nyumba zomwe amakhala? "Kuwulula kwambiri", adatero.

Mwina ndasiya gulu, koma sindinasiye Atate wathu Yehova, kapena Mwana Wake. Ndine wokondwa kuti ndapeza masamba a Beroean Pickets. Nditangowerenga nkhani zochepa chabe zokhudza nkhani za chiphunzitso, ndinafotokozera mwamuna wanga mosangalala “Awa ndi anthu anga. Amaganiza ngati ine! Ndi ofunitsitsa kudziwa choonadi. ”

Ndawononga ndalama zambiri pamankhwala osiyanasiyana pazaka 20 zapitazi, ndipo chilimbikitso chokha chomwe ndingapatse ena omwe adakumana ndi zoopsa ngati zanga, ndi ichi: Inde, kuchiritsa ndikotheka ndipo njira yokhayo yomwe yandithandizira kuthana nayo mantha ozika mtima osasunthika komanso osazindikira anali Psycho Analyst wodziwika bwino yemwe ali ndi PHD mundawo. Ndipo ndiokwera mtengo kwambiri. Ndi ochepa komanso ochepa.

Pambuyo pa zonsezi, ndidapeza kuti ndikudzipereka kwathunthu ku chifuniro cha Atate wathu komanso chikondi chopanda malire cha Ambuye wathu Yesu Khristu chomwe chasintha chomwe ndili lero: Wanga wadzuka. Ndinawamvera chisoni amayi omwe analankhula molimba mtima pamayesero ku Australia. Chiwonongeko chomwe apirira m'manja mwa anthu osazindikira, akhungu ndi chovuta kuchimvetsetsa. Komano, tonsefe tinali akhungu, sichoncho ife? Chinthu chabwino sitiyenera kuweruza ena.

Mlongo wanu

Ava

Wothandizira Osadziwika