Kufunafuna Atate

[Akaunti yanu, yoperekedwa ndi Jim Mac]

Ndikuganiza kuti kunali kumapeto kwa chilimwe cha 1962, Telstar by the Tornadoes inali kusewera pawailesi. Ndinathera masiku achilimwe pa chisumbu chokongola cha Bute kugombe lakumadzulo kwa Scotland. Tinali ndi kanyumba kakumidzi. Inalibe madzi kapena magetsi. Ntchito yanga inali yodzaza mitsuko yamadzi kuchokera pachitsime cha anthu wamba. Ng'ombe zinkayandikira ndi kuyang'ana mosamala. Ana ang'ombe ang'onoang'ono amatha kusuntha kuti awonere pamzere wakutsogolo.

Madzulo, tinkakhala pafupi ndi nyali za palafini ndi kumvetsera nkhani ndi kudya zikondamoyo zatsopano zotsukidwa ndi magalasi ang’onoang’ono a stout okoma. Nyalizo zinachititsa kuti phokoso likhale lozizirira ndipo zinachititsa tulo. Ine ndinagona pamenepo pa kama wanga ndikuyang'ana nyenyezi zikusefukira pa zenera; aliyense wa iwo ndipo ine ndinadzazidwa ndi mantha mu mtima mwanga pamene chilengedwe chinalowa mchipinda changa.

Zikumbukiro zaubwana ngati zimenezo zinkandiyendera kaŵirikaŵiri ndipo zinandikumbutsa za kuzindikira kwanga zauzimu kuyambira ndili wamng’ono, ngakhale kuti m’njira yangayanga yaubwana.

Ndinali ndi ululu wodziwa yemwe adalenga nyenyezi, mwezi, ndi chilumba chokongola chomwe chinali kutali kwambiri ndi Clydeside ya Glasgow kumene amuna opanda pake ankakhala m'makona a misewu ngati anthu ochokera ku Loury penti. Kumene malo okhala pambuyo pa nkhondo adatsekereza kuwala kwachilengedwe. Kumene agalu aumphawi ankawombola m’mabini kuti apeze nyenyeswa. Kumene zinkawoneka nthawi zonse, panali malo abwino oti aleredwe. Koma, timaphunzira kuthana ndi moyo wamanja m'manja mwathu.

N'zomvetsa chisoni kuti bambo anga anatseka maso awo pamene ndinafika zaka khumi ndi ziwiri; nthawi yovuta kwa wachinyamata akukula popanda kukhalapo kwa chikondi, koma dzanja lolimba. Mayi anga anakhala chidakwa, choncho m’mbali zambiri ndinali ndekha.

Lamlungu lina masana patapita zaka, ndinali nditakhala ndikuwerenga buku lina la mmonke wa ku Tibet - ndikuganiza kuti inali njira yanga yosadziwa kufunafuna cholinga cha moyo. Kunamveka kugogoda pachitseko. Sindikukumbukira mawu oyamba a mwamunayo, koma anaŵerenga 2 Timoteo 3:1-5 ali ndi vuto lopweteka la kulankhula. Ndinalemekeza kulimba mtima kwake pamene ankangoyenda uku ndi uku monga rabi akuŵerenga Mishnah pamene ankapapasa kuti amveketse mawuwo. Ndinamupempha kuti abwerenso mlungu wotsatira pokonzekera mayeso.

Komabe, mawu amenewo anamveka m’makutu mwanga mlungu wonsewo. Winawake adandifunsa ngati pali munthu m'mabuku, ndingadzifananize naye? Prince Myshkin kuchokera ku Dostoevsky's Chidwi, ndinayankha. Myshkin, protagonist wa Dostoevsky, adadzimva kukhala wotalikirana ndi dziko lake lodzikonda lazaka za zana la khumi ndi zisanu ndi zinayi ndipo sanamvetsetsedwe komanso yekha.

Choncho, nditamva mawu a pa 2 Timoteyo 3 , Mulungu wa chilengedwe chonsechi anayankha funso limene ndinkafufuza, lakuti, n’chifukwa chiyani dziko lili chonchi?

Mlungu wotsatira m’baleyo anabwera ndi mmodzi wa akulu, woyang’anira wotsogolera. Phunziro linayambika Choonadi Chomwe Chimatsogolera ku Moyo Wamuyaya. Patapita milungu iwiri, woyang’anira wotsogolera anabwera ndi woyang’anira dera wotchedwa Bob, yemwe kale anali mmishonale. Ndimakumbukira masanawa mwatsatanetsatane. Bob anatenga mpando wa tebulo lodyeramo naukhazika kumbuyo kutsogolo, naika manja ake pamsana wakumbuyo nati, 'Chabwino, kodi muli ndi mafunso aliwonse okhudza zimene mwaphunzira mpaka pano?'

'Zowona, pali imodzi yomwe imandidabwitsa. Ngati Adamu akanakhala ndi moyo wosatha, bwanji ngati anapunthwa n’kugwera pathanthwe?’

‘Tiyeni tione Salmo 91:10-12 ,’ anayankha Bob.

“Pakuti adzalamulira angelo ake za iwe kuti akusunge m’njira zako zonse.

Adzakunyamula m’manja mwawo, kuti phazi lako ungagunde pamwala.”

Bob anapitiriza kunena kuti uwu unali ulosi wonena za Yesu koma analingalira kuti ungagwire ntchito kwa Adamu, ndiponso, banja lonse laumunthu limene linapeza paradaiso.

Patapita nthawi, m’bale wina anandiuza kuti munthu wina anafunsa Bob funso lachilendo.

Bob anayankha ndi Obadiya vesi 4,

            “Ngakhale ukuuluka ngati chiwombankhanga ndi kumanga chisanja chako mu nyenyezi;

            kuchokera kumeneko ndidzakutsitsa,” + watero Yehova.

Ndinachita chidwi ndi mmene Baibulo linayankhira mafunso amenewa. Ndinagulitsidwa ku bungwe. Ndinabatizidwa patapita miyezi 1979 mu September XNUMX.

Mutha kufunsa mafunso, koma osafunsa mayankho

Komabe, patapita miyezi isanu ndi umodzi kapena kuposerapo, chinachake chinandivutitsa maganizo. Tinali ndi ‘odzozedwa’ oŵerengeka, ndipo ndinadabwa kuti nchifukwa ninji iwo sanali kuchirikiza ‘chakudya chauzimu’ chimene tinali kulandira. Nkhani zonse zomwe tidawerengazo zinalibe kanthu kochita ndi mamembala a otchedwa awa Gulu la Kapolo Wokhulupirika. Ndinayankhula izi ndi mmodzi wa akulu. Sanandiyankhe mogwira mtima, n’chakuti nthaŵi zina a m’gulu limenelo mwa apo ndi apo amatumizako mafunso ndi kuthandizira m’nkhani zina. Ndinkaona kuti zimenezi sizikugwirizana ndi zimene Yesu ananena. Izi zikadayenera kukhala patsogolo m'malo molemba za 'nthawi zina'. Koma sindinachitepo kanthu. Komabe, patapita mlungu umodzi, ndinadzipeza ndikuikidwa chizindikiro.

Uthenga unali womveka, lowa mu mzere. Ndikanatani? Gulu limeneli linali ndi mawu a moyo wosatha, kapena zinali tero. Kulemba chizindikiro kunali kwankhanza komanso kosayenera. Sindikudziwa chomwe chinandipweteka kwambiri, kuyika chizindikiro kapena kuti ndimamuwona mchimwene wake ngati bambo wodalirika. Ndinali ndekhanso.

Komabe, ndinadziikira mtima pansi ndipo ndinatsimikiza mumtima mwanga kupita patsogolo kukhala mtumiki wotumikira ndipo potsirizira pake ndidzakhala mkulu. Ana anga atakula n’kusiya sukulu, ndinachita upainiya.

Mudzi wa Potemkin

Pomwe nkhani zambiri zaziphunzitso zidandivutitsabe, mbali imodzi ya bungwe yomwe idandivutitsa kwambiri inali, ndipo ndikusowa kwa chikondi. Sizinali nkhani zazikulu, zochititsa chidwi nthawi zonse, koma nkhani za tsiku ndi tsiku monga miseche, miseche ndi akulu kuswa zinsinsi pokambirana ndi akazi awo. Panali tsatanetsatane wa nkhani zachiweruzo zomwe zimayenera kuperekedwa kwa makomiti okha koma zidadziwika. Kaŵirikaŵiri ndimalingalira za chiyambukiro cha ‘zopanda ungwiro’ zimenezi pa ozunzidwa ndi kusasamala koteroko. Ndimakumbukira kuti ndinali pa msonkhano wachigawo ku Ulaya ndikulankhula ndi mlongo wina. Kenako, m’bale wina anafika n’kunena kuti, ‘mlongo uja munalankhula naye kuti ndi hule. Sindinafunikire kudziwa zimenezo. N’kutheka kuti ankangofuna kuti zinthu zimuyendere bwino.

Pamisonkhano ya akulu panali kulimbirana mphamvu, kudzikuza, kukangana kosalekeza, ndi kusalemekeza Mzimu wa Mulungu kumene kunali kufunidwa kuchiyambi kwa msonkhanowo.

Zinandidetsa nkhawanso kuti achichepere angalimbikitsidwe kubatizidwa ali achichepere azaka khumi ndi zitatu kenako n’kusankha kupita kukafesa oats wawo wakuthengo ndikupeza kuti achotsedwa mu mpingo, ndiyeno, nkukhala chakumbuyo kwinaku akudikirira kubwezeretsedwa. Zimenezi zinali zosiyana kwambiri ndi Fanizo la Mwana Wolowerera amene bambo ake anamuona ‘patali kwambiri’ ndipo anakonza zoti asangalale ndi kulemekeza mwana wake amene walapa.

Ndipo komabe, monga bungwe, tidakonda kwambiri chikondi chomwe tinali nacho. Unali mudzi wonse wa Potemkin womwe sunawonetse zenizeni zomwe zinali kuchitika.

Ndikukhulupirira kuti ambiri amazindikira akakumana ndi zowawa ndipo inenso ndidachita chimodzimodzi. Mu 2009, ndinali kukamba nkhani ya onse mumpingo wapafupi. Mkazi wanga atatuluka m’holoyo, anamva ngati agwa.

'Tiyeni tipite kuchipatala,' ndinatero.

'Ayi, osadandaula, ndikungofunika kugona.'

'Ayi, chonde, tiyeni tizipita,' ndinaumirirabe.

Atamuyeza bwinobwino, dokotala wachinyamatayo anamutumiza ku CT scan, ndipo anabwerera ndi zotsatira zake. Anatsimikizira kuopa kwanga koipitsitsa. Chinali chotupa muubongo. Ndipotu, atafufuza mowonjezereka, anali ndi zotupa zingapo, kuphatikizapo khansa ya m'matumbo a lymph.

Tsiku lina madzulo nditawachezera kuchipatala, zinaonekeratu kuti akuipiraipira. Titacheza ndinadumphira mgalimoto kuwauza mayi ake. Ku Scotland kunagwa chipale chofewa mlungu umenewo, ine ndekha ndinali dalaivala m’msewuwo. Mwadzidzidzi, galimotoyo inatha mphamvu. Mafuta anandithera. Ndinaimbira foni kampani yotumizirana zinthu, ndipo mtsikanayo anandiuza kuti sapita ku nkhani zamafuta. Ndinaitana wachibale kuti andithandize.

Patangopita mphindi zochepa munthu wina anaimirira kumbuyo kwanga n’kunena kuti, ‘Ndakuona uli mbali ina, ukufunika thandizo?’ Maso anga anagwetsa misozi chifukwa cha kukoma mtima kwa mlendo ameneyu. Anali atayenda ulendo wa makilomita 12 kupita n’kubwera kudzathandiza. Pali mphindi m'moyo zomwe zimavina m'mitu yathu. Alendo omwe timakumana nawo, ngakhale kwakanthawi, komabe sitiwaiwala. Mausiku angapo pambuyo pa kukumana kumeneku, mkazi wanga anamwalira. Inali February 2010.

Ngakhale kuti ndinali mkulu mpainiya wokhala ndi moyo wotanganitsidwa, kusungulumwa kwamadzulo kunali kovutirapo. Ndinkayenda pagalimoto kwa mphindi 30 kupita kumsika wapafupi kwambiri ndikukhala ndi khofi ndi kubwerera kunyumba. Nthawi ina, ndinakwera ndege yotsika mtengo kupita ku Bratislava ndipo ndinadabwa kuti n’chifukwa chiyani ndinachitira zimenezi nditafika. Ndinkangosungulumwa ngati thumba lopanda kanthu.

Chilimwe chimenecho, sindinapiteko ku Msonkhano Wachigawo wanthaŵi zonse, ndinawopa kuti chifundo cha abale chidzakhala chokulirapo. Ndinakumbukira DVD imene gulu linatulutsa yonena za misonkhano ya mayiko. Zinawonetsa Philippines kuphatikizapo kuvina kotchedwa kulira. Ndikuganiza kuti anali mwana mkati mwanga, koma ndinaonera DVD iyi mobwerezabwereza. Ndinakumananso ndi abale ndi alongo ambiri a ku Filipino ku Rome pamene ndinkapita kumeneko, ndipo nthawi zambiri ndinkasangalatsidwa ndi kuchereza kwawo. Chotero, ndi msonkhano wachingelezi mu November ku Manila chaka chimenecho, ndinaganiza zopita.

Pa tsiku loyamba, ndinakumana ndi mlongo wina wochokera kumpoto kwa Philippines ndipo msonkhano utatha tinadyera limodzi chakudya. Tinapitirizabe kulankhulana, ndipo ndinayenda maulendo angapo kukamuona. Panthawiyo, boma la UK likukhazikitsa malamulo oletsa anthu olowa m'dzikolo ndikuletsa nzika zaku UK kwa zaka khumi; tinayenera kusuntha mwachangu ngati mlongoyu akhale mkazi wanga. Ndipo kotero, pa December 25, 2012, mkazi wanga watsopano anafika ndipo anapatsidwa unzika wa UK posakhalitsa.

Inayenera kukhala nthawi yosangalatsa, koma posakhalitsa tinazindikira zosiyana. Mboni zambiri zinkatinyalanyaza, makamaka ine. Ngakhale ndi Galamukani yomwe inali ndi nkhani ya panthawiyo yochirikiza mfundo yakuti amuna amakwatira mwamsanga kuposa akazi pambuyo pa imfa, sizinathandize. Zinandifooketsa kwambiri kupita kumisonkhano ndipo madzulo ena pamene mkazi wanga anali kukonzekera msonkhano wa Lachinayi, ndinamuuza kuti sindibwerera. Anavomera nanyamukanso.

Njira Yotuluka

Tinaganiza zowerenga Mauthenga Abwino ndi Bukhu la Machitidwe ndipo mwadongosolo tinadzifunsa tokha, kodi Mulungu ndi Yesu amafuna chiyani kwa ife? Izi zinabweretsa ufulu waukulu. Kwa zaka makumi atatu zapitazi, ndakhala ndikuzungulira ngati kamvuluvulu wa Dervish ndipo sindimaganiza zotsika. Pakakhala maulendo odziimba mlandu ngati nditakhala pansi ndikuwonera kanema kapena kupita kokasangalala kwa tsiku limodzi. Popanda ubusa kapena nkhani ndi zinthu zoti ndikonzekere, ndinali ndi nthawi yowerenga mawu a Mulungu paokha popanda chisonkhezero chakunja. Zinamveka zotsitsimula.

Koma panthawiyi, mphekesera zinamveka zoti ndine wampatuko. Kuti ndinakwatira chowonadi. Kuti ndinakumana ndi mkazi wanga pa webusaiti Russian mkwatibwi ndi zina zotero. Munthu akasiya Mboni, makamaka akakhala mkulu kapena m’bale amene ankamuona kuti ndi wauzimu, pamakhala kusiyana maganizo. Iwo amayamba kukayikira zikhulupiriro zawo kapena kupeza njira yopezera zifukwa zimene m’baleyo anasiya. Chotsatiracho amachichita mwa kugwiritsira ntchito mawu ena monga ofooka, ofooka, osakhala auzimu, kapena ampatuko. Ndi njira yawo yotetezera maziko awo osalimba.

Panthawiyo, ndinawerenga Palibe Chochitira Kaduka ndi Barbara Demick. Iye ndi wochokera ku North Korea. Kufanana pakati pa ulamuliro waku North Korea ndi anthu kunali kogwirizana. Adalemba za anthu aku North Korea ali ndi malingaliro awiri otsutsana m'mitu yawo: kukondera kwachidziwitso ngati masitima oyenda mizere yofananira. Panali mkuluyo akuganiza kuti Kim Jong Un ndi mulungu, koma kusowa kwa umboni wotsimikizira zomwe akunenazo. Ngati anthu aku North Korea akanalankhula poyera za zotsutsana zotere, adzipeza ali m'malo achinyengo. Chomvetsa chisoni n’chakuti mphamvu ya boma, monganso mmene anthu amakhalira, ndiyo kudzipatula kotheratu. Tengani mphindi zochepa kuti muwerenge mawu ofunikira kuchokera m'buku la Demick patsamba la Goodreads Palibe Chochitira Kaduka Mawu a Barbara Demick | Zowerenga zabwino

Nthaŵi zambiri ndimamva chisoni ndikamaona a Mboni za Yehova akale akugwa m’chikhulupiriro chokana Mulungu n’kuyamba kuchita zinthu zimene dziko la azungu likuchita polimbana ndi kusakhulupirira Mulungu. Mulungu watipatsa mwayi wokhala ndi ufulu wosankha. Sichanzeru kusankha kuimba mlandu Mulungu chifukwa cha mmene zinthu zinayendera. Baibulo lili ndi machenjezo ambiri okhudza kukhulupirira anthu. Ngakhale kuti tachoka, tonse tidakali m’mavuto amene Satana anayambitsa. Kodi ndi kukhulupirika kwa Mulungu ndi Khristu, kapena satanac zeitgeist zomwe zikusesa Kumadzulo?

Kuyang'ananso ndikofunikira mukachoka. Tsopano muli nokha ndi vuto la kudya mwauzimu ndi kupanga umunthu watsopano. Ndidadzipereka ku bungwe lachifundo la UK lomwe limayang'ana kwambiri kuyimbira anthu achikulire, osowa pakhomo komanso kucheza nawo nthawi yayitali. Ndinaphunziranso BA in Humanities (English Literature and Creative Writing). Komanso, COVID itafika ndidachita MA mu Creative Writing. Chodabwitsa n’chakuti, imodzi mwa nkhani zomalizira za msonkhano wadera imene ndinakamba inali yonena za maphunziro owonjezereka. Ndimaona kuti ndiyenera kunena kuti ‘pepani’ kwa mlongo wachitsikana wachifalansa amene ndinalankhula naye tsiku limenelo. Muyenera kuti munali kunjenjemera mu mtima mwake pamene ndinamufunsa zimene anali kuchita ku Scotland. Anaphunzira ku Glasgow University.

Tsopano, ndimagwiritsa ntchito luso lolemba lopatsidwa ndi Mulungu lomwe ndapeza kuti ndithandize anthu kumvetsera mbali yawo yauzimu polemba mabulogu. Ndimakhalanso woyenda m'mapiri ndipo nthawi zambiri ndimapemphera ndisanayang'ane malo. Mosapeweka, Mulungu ndi Yesu amatumiza anthu njira yanga. Izi zonse zimathandiza kudzaza malo opanda kanthu omwe kusiya Nsanja ya Olonda kunabwera pa ine. Pokhala ndi Yehova ndi Kristu m’miyoyo yathu, sitidzimva tokha.

Patadutsa zaka khumi ndi zitatu, sindikudandaula za kuchoka. Ndimaganiza za Agidiyoni ndi Anineve ngakhale kuti sanali mbali ya gulu la Aisrayeli, Mulungu anawachitira chifundo ndi kuwakonda. Panali munthu wa pa Luka chaputala 9 amene anatulutsa ziwanda m’dzina la Yesu ndipo atumwi anatsutsa chifukwa sanali m’gulu lawo.

Yesu anayankha kuti: 'Musamuletse, pakuti iye amene satsutsana nanu ali kumbali yanu.'

Wina ananenapo, kuti kusiya bungwe kunali ngati kusiya Hotel California, mukhoza kutuluka, koma kwenikweni kusiya. Koma sindimagwirizana nazo. Pakhala pali kuwerenga ndi kufufuza kwakukulu pamalingaliro onama omwe amatsatira ziphunzitso ndi ndondomeko za bungwe. Zimenezo zinatenga kanthawi. Zolemba za Ray Franz ndi James Penton, pamodzi ndi mbiri ya Barbara Anderson pa bungweli, zinakhala zothandiza kwambiri. Koma koposa zonse, kungowerenga Chipangano Chatsopano kumatulutsa imodzi kuchokera ku ulamuliro wamalingaliro womwe nthawi ina unkandilamulira. Ndikukhulupirira kuti kutaya kwakukulu ndi kudziwika kwathu. Ndipo monga Myshkin, timadzipeza tili m'dziko lachilendo. Komabe, m’Baibulo muli anthu ambiri amene anachita zinthu zofanana ndi zimenezi.

Ndikuthokoza kwambiri abale amene anandichititsa chidwi ndi Malemba. Ndimayamikiranso moyo wolemera umene ndakhala nawo. Ndinakamba nkhani ku Philippines, Rome, Sweden, Norway, Poland, Germany, London, m’litali ndi m’lifupi la Scotland, kuphatikizapo zisumbu za kugombe la kumadzulo. Ndinasangalalanso ndi Misonkhano ya Mayiko ku Edinburgh, Berlin, ndi Paris. Koma, pamene chinsalu chidzutsidwa ndipo chikhalidwe chenicheni cha bungwe chiwululidwa, palibe kukhala ndi bodza; zinakhala zopanikiza. Koma kuchoka kuli ngati mkuntho wa Atlantic, timamva kuti ngalawa yasweka, koma tidzuke pamalo abwino.

Tsopano, ine ndi mkazi wanga timamva dzanja lotonthoza la Mulungu ndi Yesu m’miyoyo yathu. Posachedwapa, ndinapimidwa ndi dokotala. Ndinali ndi nthawi yokawonana ndi mlangizi kuti ndipeze zotsatira. Tinawerenga lemba m’maŵa umenewo monga mmene timachitira m’maŵa uliwonse. Salmo 91:1,2, XNUMX.

‘Iye amene akhala m’malo obisalamo a Wam’mwambamwamba

Adzakhala mu mthunzi wa Wamphamvuyonse.

Ndidzati kwa Yehova, “Inu ndinu pothawirapo panga ndi linga langa.

Mulungu wanga, amene ndimkhulupirira.'

Ndinauza mkazi wanga kuti, 'Lero timva nkhani zoipa.' Anavomera. Nthawi zambiri Mulungu ankatipatsa mauthenga kudzera m’Malemba amene ankafotokoza mosapita m’mbali. Mulungu akupitiriza kuyankhula monga momwe amalankhulira nthawi zonse, koma nthawi zina, vesi loyenera limalowa mozizwitsa m'miyendo yathu ikafunika.

Ndipo zedi, ma cell a prostate omwe adanditumikira mokhulupirika, adakhala adani ndipo adayambitsa kupanduka kwa kapamba ndi chiwindi komanso amene amadziwa kwina.

Mlangizi amene anaulula izi, anandiyang'ana ndipo anati, 'Ndiwe wolimba mtima kwambiri pa izi.'

Ndinayankha, 'Chabwino, ziri chonchi, muli mnyamata mkati mwanga. Wanditsatira moyo wake wonse. Msinkhu wake, sindikudziwa, koma amakhalapo nthawi zonse. Amanditonthoza ndipo kupezeka kwake kumanditsimikizira kuti Mulungu ali ndi chiyembekezo chamuyaya kaamba ka ine,’ ndinayankha motero. Zoona zake n’zakuti, Mulungu ‘anaika umuyaya m’mitima mwathu. Kukhalapo kwa ine wamng'onoyo kumandikhutiritsa.

Tinafika kunyumba tsiku limenelo ndi kuŵerenga Salmo 91 lonse ndipo tinatonthozedwa kwambiri. Ndilibe chidwi ndi zomwe Ajeremani amachitcha torchlusspanik, kuzindikira kuti zitseko zikunditsekera ine. Ayi, ndimadzuka ndili ndi mtendere wodabwitsa umene umachokera kwa Mulungu ndi Kristu basi.

[Mavesi onse ogwidwa mawu a m’Baibulo la Berean Standard Bible, BSB.]