WT Study: Do You “Love Your Neighbor as Yourself”?

– posted by meleti

[From ws15/11 for Jan. 18-24]


“You must love your neighbor as yourself.” – Mt 22:39.


Paragraph 7 of this week’s study opens with this sentence: “Although a husband is the head of his wife, the Bible instructs him to ‘assign her honor.’”
Would it not be more appropriate to say Because a husband is the head of his wife, the Bible instructs him to ‘assign her honor’”?  Using “although” is like saying, “in spite of the fact”, which indicates that the writer considers that being head wouldn't normally imply assigning honor to those over whom he presides, but "although" that might be the case, the Bible says differently.
That JWs have a skewed view of headship is evident by the way many males in the organization view the female.  Elders will often view a single sister (even a married one) as someone over whom they have the authority to act as head.  This is not the Bible's teaching.
Governing Body member Geoffrey Jackson, when questioned by the Australia Royal Commission, would not countenance the possibility of allowing women into the judicial process other than as witnesses.
Sadly, the misapplication of the headship principal, both inside and outside the Organization, has caused many woman to reject the principle stated in 1Co 11:3.

“But I want you to know that the head of every man is the Christ; in turn, the head of a woman is the man; in turn, the head of the Christ is God.” (1Co 11:3)


Yet, before we reject out of hand a clearly stated Scriptural principle, let us first consider our head, Jesus. He said: “…I do nothing of my own initiative; but just as the Father taught me I speak these things.” (Joh 8:28)
A boss tells you what to do and doesn’t have to explain himself. He acts on his own discretion. You can take it or you can quit.  However, a head as defined in Scripture does only what the Father tells him to do; he does not act on his own initiative. That is how Jesus acted and he is my head. Am I to act differently? Am I to act on my own initiative apart from the things Jesus has taught me?  Am I to come up with teachings of my own, apart from God's?
Headship is therefore a Scriptural chain of command. The commands come from God and are relayed down the line. Therefore, as head it is not my place to command my wife. It is my place to help her obey the commands of God as I too strive to obey them.
Jesus, as the perfect head, submitted himself to the congregation for the purpose of purifying and beautifying it. He put the interests of the congregation above his own. That is what headship really means.

“Be in subjection to one another in fear of Christ.” (Eph 5:21)


Opening with this, Paul shows that all congregation members are in subjection to each other.  Then specifically to husbands, he states:

“Husbands, continue loving your wives, just as the Christ also loved the congregation and gave himself up for it, 26 in order that he might sanctify it, cleansing it with the bath of water by means of the word,” (Eph 5:25, 26)


If we do not object to Jesus as our head, then a husband who properly imitates our Lord in his headship role will win the admiration and approval of his wife.
Now on a related matter, verse 33 used to puzzle me.

“Nevertheless, each one of you must love his wife as he does himself; on the other hand, the wife should have deep respect for her husband.” (Eph 5:33)


At first glance, this counsel does not appear to be even-handed.  Is the wife not also required to love her husband as she does herself?  Is the husband not also required to show deep respect for his wife?
Then I came to realize that the verse is actually telling each one the same thing.  It is telling both how to show love for the other.  But since men and women view the expression of love differently—it's a Mars vs. Venus thing—the focus on each is different.
Men can easily become selfish in a marriage and fail to demonstrate their love regularly, both in deed and by word. (Do women ever tire of hearing a husband say, “I love you”?) Men need to think of their wives first, before themselves.
On the other hand, men perceive love differently from women. Let me give you a scenario.
The kitchen sink is leaking. The husband gets out his tools and rolls up his sleeves, all set to do the job. The wife takes one look at him, another at the sink, and utters the fateful words: “Honey, maybe we should call a plumber.”
She’s just trying to be helpful, but what he hears is ‘I don’t trust that you can fix this’. Maybe she’s right. That doesn’t matter however. A man will take this as a sign of disrespect, whether the woman meant it that way or not. It will hurt him.  (I'm speaking in generalities.  There are men who are very secure with their masculinity for whom this statement of the wife would be no problem.  However, in my humble opinion, they are a very tiny minority.)
Every time a woman shows respect for her husband, he hears “I love you.”
I realize I've gotten off topic.  My apologies.  However, in my defense, this Watchtower study does that as well, as we’ll see shortly when the real topic of the article is made clear. (Hint: It’s the same topic we had last week.)

Have Love for Fellow Worshippers


Paragraph 11 states [boldface added]: “Genuine love and unity identify Jehovah’s servants as the ones who practice the true religion, for Jesus said: 'By this all will know that you are my disciples—if you have love among yourselves.'” (John 13:34, 35) This sums up what the previous two paragraphs were stipulating.

Because we have intense love for our fellow servants of Jehovah, we make up a unique worldwide organization. (Par. 9)


How thankful we are that love—“a perfect bond of union”—prevails among us regardless of our background or national origin! (Par. 10)


(Paragraph 11 also quotes 1 John 3:10, 11 to make its point. Notice however that those verses refer to the “children of God and the children of the Devil” being made evident by the love (or lack thereof) they display. No mention is made of the “friends of God”, that third group only Jehovah’s Witnesses believe in.)
This subtitle serves as a launch platform for the next subtitle that gets us off the topic of “love of neighbor” and instead is used to give us yet another booster shot of pride in the Organization and its alleged unique and blessed role.

Gathering “A Great Crowd”


Paragraph 14 through 16 are intended to reassure us that we are the chosen of God.

14 When the last days began in 1914, there were only a few thousand servants of Jehovah worldwide. Motivated by love for neighbor, and with the backing of God’s spirit, a small remnant of anointed Christians persevered in the Kingdom-preaching work. As a result, today a great crowd with an earthly hope is being gathered. Our ranks have grown to about 8,000,000 Witnesses associated with more than 115,400 congregations throughout the earth, and we continue to grow in number. For example, over 275,500 new Witnesses were baptized during the 2014 service year—an average of some 5,300 each week.


15 The scope of the preaching work is remarkable. Our Bible-based literature is now published in over 700 languages. The Watchtower is the most widely distributed magazine in the world. Over 52,000,000 copies are printed each month, and the magazine is published in 247 languages. Upwards of 200,000,000 copies of our Bible study book What Does the Bible Really Teach? have been printed in more than 250 languages.


16 The remarkable growth that we see today is the result of our faith in God and full acceptance of the Bible—Jehovah’s miraculously inspired Word. (1 Thess. 2:13) Especially outstanding is the spiritual prosperity of Jehovah’s people—despite the hatred and opposition of Satan, “the god of this system of things.”—2 Cor. 4:4.


If you are a normal, rank-and-file Jehovah’s Witness, you will come away from this study believing that only we have true brotherly love out of all the religions that profess Christianity. You will believe that our love measures up to Jesus’ words at John 13:34, 35. You will believe that because of this love, Jehovah is blessing us with rapid worldwide expansion that no other religion can match and that our preaching work is unique and unprecedented.
You will want to hold on to this belief because you have been taught that your salvation depends on staying in the Organization, as you’ve just read in paragraph 13 of this study:

13 Soon God will destroy this wicked world in the “great tribulation.”…But because of his love for his servants, Jehovah will preserve them as a group and will usher them into his new world.


Digging Deeper


For years—decades—we have accepted at face value all that The Watchtower teaches. No more. Let us examine everything stated above to see if it is accurate.
We’ll start with the premise on which we base our belief that Jehovah approves of us organizationally, e.g., our “intense and prevailing love for one another.” We based this on John 13:34, 35, but are we misapplying those verses? You will notice that when paragraph 11 refers to verse 35, it does so by quoting only this part: “By this all will know that you are my disciples—if you have love among yourselves.”
How easy it is for us to gloss over this, because we know we have love for one another as we define love. Are we not nice to one another, friendly, even supportive under certain circumstances? Yet, is that the type of love Jesus meant?
No, not at all. In fact, he says elsewhere:

“…And if YOU greet YOUR brothers only, what extraordinary thing are YOU doing? Are not also the people of the nations doing the same thing? 48 YOU must accordingly be perfect, as YOUR heavenly Father is perfect.” (Mt 5:47, 48)


Jesus is talking about perfect love. And how is that defined? Again returning to John 13:34, 35, let’s read the part The Watchtower failed to quote.

“I am giving you a new commandment, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, you also love one another.” (Joh 13:34)


Do Jehovah’s Witnesses love one another just as Jesus loved his disciples? Jesus died for his disciples. In fact, what is said about the Father can be said about the Son who is the exact representation of God.

“. . .But God recommends his own love to us in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Ro 5:8)


If we are to be perfect in love, then our love does not stop at the Kingdom Hall door nor at the doorstep when out in the ministry.
What is the reality in the Organization?
It is true that you will have many friends in the congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses if you are “one of us”. That means, if you are active in the preaching work, regular at the meetings and never disagree with anything the elders nor the Governing Body have to say. You will be considered a friend. But it is not the “perfect love” Jesus spoke of at Mt 5:47, 48, nor the self-sacrificing love he demonstrated to the point of death. It is instead a highly conditional love.
Drop your meeting attendance, or become irregular in the ministry, or God forbid, suggest that one teaching of the Governing Body is flawed, and you’ll see this love disappear faster than a puddle in the Mojave Desert.
Nevertheless, do not believe this because I say it, nor because of the many testimonials from others on this web site and elsewhere who have experienced this firsthand. No, but instead, test it out for yourself. Join one of the Jehovah’s Witness Facebook groups or go to a web site that supports jw.org. Then raise a valid question about some teaching and see if 1Pe 3:15 is followed as paragraph 13 of this study says it should be:

When we make a defense before everyone who demands of us a reason for our hope, we do so “with a mild temper and deep respect” because we are motivated by neighbor love. (Par. 13)


Based on these words, you would expect to be given a respectful and well-reasoned argument from Scripture. What I have seen time and again is that Scriptures are rarely used, but instead the questioner is accused of having ulterior motives, of being argumentative, disruptive, and divisive. He’s accused of not respecting theocratic order and is often called a Korah. Soon the “A” word is mentioned and before you know it, you are cut out of the group or web site. It you are known to the group, you will likely be reported to the elders or the Circuit Overseer. This is how we apply 1Pe 3:15 and John 13:34, 35.
That fact is we honor 1Pe 3:15 with our lips, but our hearts are far removed from its spirit. (Mark 7:6)
Is this the kind of perfect love from the Father which Jesus told us to imitate?

Growth Means God’s Blessing


Of course, nowhere in the Bible are we told to recognize God’s blessing based on increasing numbers and growth. If anything, the opposite is true. (Mt 7:13, 14)
Yet even in this measure which we esteem so highly, we fall short.
We proudly proclaim that we number 8 million, up from only a few thousand 100 years ago, and that we have baptized 275,500 in 2014. This is taken as evidence of Jehovah’s blessing.
If so, then what of God's blessing on the Seventh Day Adventists?  Should not the same measuring stick apply to them?
They had their start only 15 years before we did, yet now number 18 million. They have missionaries in 200 lands. And, get this, they baptized over 1 million in 2014.[i] So if numerical growth is a measure of God’s blessing, they have us beat.
There is also more to be learned by examining our boast that we baptized 275,500 in 2014.  You might think that means we grew by that number, but in fact we only grew by 169,000.[ii] Where'd the 100,000 go?  Only a fraction of that can be accounted for by death.
The most telling figure is the latest one. The world population grows at 1.1% per year, so just baptizing our young should result in a similar growth rate. We grew last year by 1.5%.  That means that subtracting the effect of population growth, we grew worldwide by only 0.4% in 2015. Yet the article claims this “remarkable growth” is because of "the backing of God’s spirit."
We do have the most widely circulated magazines in the world. That is true. We print 52 million copies of the Watchtower every two months. The magazine has only 16 pages. So annually, we print almost 5 billion pages of the Watchtower.
The third most widely distributed magazine in the world is AARP at 22.5 million copies, also published every two months. It has 96 pages. So its annual printing amounts to 12 billion pages, almost 2 ½ times that of the Watchtower.[iii]
This should show us how meaningless, even silly, it is to base our belief that Jehovah approves of us on the quantity of printed material we produce.
Now perhaps you reason: "But we’re a religious organization. Different standards apply. We are doing God’s will and our numbers reflect God’s blessing."
Okay, then if so, no other religious organization—because we believe all the rest are false religion—should outshine us, right?
So here we are boasting of publishing Bible-based literature in 700 languages. Wonderful! But what makes up that number?  Many times we are counting a tract or pamphlet.  Print a four-page pamphlet and we've added another language.
Now let’s compare:
According to the Wycliffe.org site, there are more than 1,300 distinct language translations of the Bible.  Which religious organizations did that?   Furthermore, in over 131 countries, active translation and linguistic development work is happening to bring the Bible, or portions thereof, to speakers of over 2,300 other languages.  (Sounds like someone else has the idea of Regional Translation Offices.)
Who is doing all of this? Not us!
If the number of languages in which our literature is available means God approves of us and is blessing us, would his blessing not be upon those who are not translating the words of men, but His own words, and in far more languages than we?

The Myth of Remarkable Growth


Paragraph 16 calls our growth “remarkable”.  The reality is we grew last year by 1.1% internal growth and 0.4% external, for a grand total of 1.5%.  This is called remarkable. This is called God's "speeding up of the work".
Additionally, this remarkable growth was accomplished “despite the hatred and opposition of Satan.” Where is the evidence for all this hatred, opposition, and persecution?
The fact is, if it were not for Africa and Latin America, our worldwide numbers would be negative. Even without factoring in population growth, they are negative in most of Europe, Canada and the United States. Yet we have nothing else to point to for “proof” of God’s blessing, so new methods are being sought to bolster the numbers; like including the aged ones by allowing them to count 15 minutes of service per month; or boosting the Bible study numbers by allowing us to count return visits as Bible studies - while still counting them as return visits, mind you.
This Watchtower study is supposed to teach us about displaying love for neighbor.  How valuable and practical that would be.  However, half our time is going to be spent on yet another promo article for the Organization.
We should not be bragging about ourselves. Building pride in the Organization will only fulfill the warning of Proverbs 16:18.
______________________________________________________
[i] See Adventist statistics here.
[ii] All figures taken from the annual Yearbooks available on jw.org
[iii] To see the top 10 magazines based on circulation, click here.

Archived Comments

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  • Comment by Marvin Shilmer on 2016-01-18 12:15:40

    Meleti, Your work demonstrates an abiding love for your brothers and sisters, neighbors, and for truth. This is another of your fine written works. Thanks!

    • Reply by katrina on 2016-01-24 09:07:34

      "Drop your meeting attendance, or become irregular in the ministry, or God forbid, suggest that one teaching of the Governing Body is flawed, and you’ll see this love disappear faster than a puddle in the Mojave Desert."
      Sadly this is very true, I myself am feeling this, quite a few are shunning me not even saying hello because of this very reason, still there are a few that don't.
      Makes on feel unloved yet I am not their for popularity and don't expect them to love me back anymore.

      • Reply by SopaterOfBeroea on 2016-01-24 09:36:33

        Katrina,
        It is a tenet of JW that love toward members is conditional. You don't realize this until you get out of lockstep with the crowd. Elders are removed quickly so that the congregation will lose respect for them, The elder is then marginalized so that whatever happens (fade, DF, DA) the congregation already views him (and his family) as losers and its good riddance.
        This is all part of the strategy of the GB to retain membership and absolute control.
        Sopater

        • Reply by katrina on 2016-01-24 21:50:03

          It is very unloving and I won't allow them to control me, if and when I go its not because of having to but because I want to anymore. I feel a certain amount of freedom in a sense as I have discovered what it really means to know Christ, though rarely mentioned at the KH, I feel sad for JW and try to take away what good I can from the meetings. I wish it was different though but it is all about control of the group individuals are dispensable and if one is not walking the walk and talking the talk your shunned.

          • Reply by SopaterOfBeroea on 2016-01-24 22:16:36

            We all feel this freedom sister, amen. Jehovah and Christ are providing this fellowship which allows us freedom to express our faith without fear of being judged.
            We can remain cautious and in control. If not for having this outlet it would be much more difficult for us to remain in association, Speaking for my wife and I, we bite our tongues and roll our eyes so often during the meetings..... it's a wonder no one has noticed. On the way home and for an hour afterward, we are discussing all the things we disagree with.
            We do feel compassion for our dear friends...... and can help them learn to do their own research. But beyond that, we are mostly helpless. We are at peace and know that Jehovah will draw them to him in time if that is his will.
            We have an exit strategy in place and will proceed as the spirit leads us. Jehovah gives us wisdom which allows us to be shrewd and avoid the calamity. (Prov 13:16)
            Phileo,
            Sopater

            • Reply by katrina on 2016-01-26 00:40:29

              It is hard when your on your own, or if your with a mate that hasn't woken up. I don't go to the TMS or family night what ever it is, I find it hard to go to the Sunday meetings. And I get the eyes rolling thing I got caught a few times, maybe that is why they are shunning me. Oh well. I feel as if I am being led out for my own mental well being, its not a good place to be when you know a lot of being taught is total rubbish. Its depressing, though I care about the b/s thing is its very conditional on there part its as if I am the enemy.
              thanks for your replies helps.

  • Comment by yobec on 2016-01-18 12:46:07

    It is amazing the things you discover when you do research . Thanks

  • Comment by F.S. on 2016-01-18 13:05:55

    Thanks Meleti for another well written observation of this weeks W.T..
    Do you know that we will be counting the viewing of videos at the door? A few weeks ago I received this info from my service overseer...please read..
    Revised Field Service Report (S-4): Beginning in January 2016, all placements— whether printed or electronic—will be reported in one combined category entitled “Placements.” (Electronic placements would include files of or links to videos, books, magazines, articles, tracts, and so forth.) Additionally, a new category entitled “Video Showings” will be used to report the number of times we were able to show one of our videos in the ministry.

  • Comment by Roger Kirkpatrick on 2016-01-18 13:06:52

    This discussion touches on something I have observed for years. I have noticed that many people mistake RESPONSIBILITY for AUTHORITY. Furthermore, most who make that mistake also fail to recognize their ACCOUNTABILITY for their actions toward others, especially toward those perceived as lesser ones. My experience has been that such persons are usually bullies. I've learned that the best way to deal with bullies is to help them to recognize their accountability for their actions toward others, and the most effective way of doing so is in writing.

  • Comment by yobec on 2016-01-18 13:19:27

    Years ago, when using the truth book with my studies, I was thrilled to show "my bible studies", how we were the only ones that had all the identifiable traits of the "true religion"
    One of these traits was that the true religion would be recognizes by the LOVE the members would have for one another.
    It is only within the last few years that I have come to understand that Jesus did not say those exact words. What he did say was that "you will know my DISCIPLES
    by the love.....
    Jesus did not come here to start a religion nor an organization. The word "religion" is not even found in the bible. What he did do is form a"brotherhood".
    This, in my opinion changes things a lot. I believe that one can be his disciples and part of that brotherhood, whether inside or outside a religious institution just as long as they accept Christ as their Savior and obey his commandments. Whether or not this disciple believes a false doctrine is not so much a disqualification. Not that I believe in it, but can one truly say that the belief of the Trinity is more of an offense than that of teaching that Christ is not the mediator of all Christians?
    Rather than the determining factor for salvation being having the right doctrines,
    I think the determining factor will be, as Jesus said, based on how we have treated others.
    And that can be done by Christ's disciples no matter where they are religiously or non- religiously located.

    • Reply by Vincent Gomez on 2016-01-18 17:56:46

      Yobec, your thought about how we were so proud that we were the only ones who showed true love was common with us all. But I am sure, that most of  us reflect back and admit that we were only trying to convince our ownselves of this. Smiling, shaking hands is not proof of this. I think about all the years I have been in the"truth". Shouldn't I have had more than two real friends?  Most relationships were not deep.  Especially with the ones who were "busy", such as elders. Most elders I have had dealings with were the most arrogant jerks I ever dealt with. It has been my experience that "nice guys finish last". We were the ones always "waiting on Jehovah" while the others got away with everything and anything. Never had a fellow elder as a genuine friend. Most relationships were "tolerant" ones. So much unspoken jealousy and competition. How many elders actually serve out of love?  Let's be honest. Even "acts of love" when you needed help,  many times it was done because that is what we did as witnesses. It was expected. Sort of like we did KH building. Love had nothing to do with it. We were so busy with nonsense that we really didn't take time to get to know too many intimately. I believe that if I were to go into a KH today, with open eyes. it wouldn't appear loving at all. All this love talk is a a veneer. Just another propaganda scheme.

      • Reply by Father jack on 2016-01-19 04:00:17

        Thats pretty much what ive seen and experienced as well vincent . We were that busy in mundane works for the religion that we didnt have much time to get to know the brothers let alone love them, and some we on some sort of power trip as far as i could see . I went through a stage where i hated the elders meetings i found it sickening the way they used to denigrate many of the brothers and sisters . There were some genuine people in the mix of course but in the end you got voted against in a democratic (theocratic ) vote .

  • Comment by Father jack on 2016-01-18 13:31:05

    Thanks for the review meleti you have made some interesting observations . Ive just read the watchtower article . The big problem that i have is that the J Ws always seem to equate loving ones nieghbour with the preaching work . However 1 corinthians 13 in pauls definition of love , he shows love to active . The real truth is in my opinion that many other religious entities completely outshine us on this point , the actual verse at john 13 v 35 says by this ALL will know that you are my disciples if you have love among yourselves . So the real point paul was making here is that people in general on the outside would regonise that the love we display proves to them we belong to christ . Ask ourselves a question DO THEY RECOGNISE THE WITNESSES AS CHRISTS DISCIPLES . Well speaking to many people i know they DO NOT Sadly they recognise us as anything but . Why could it be in reality our love is severely lacking for both our brothers and our neighbour . ?

    • Reply by F J on 2016-01-18 14:06:01

      Sorry it wasnt pauls point it was jesus himself wasnt it .

  • Comment by Susan on 2016-01-18 15:32:20

    This WT article reminds me of Luke 10:29 - looking to justify oneself. When Jesus was asked that who is my neighbor question, he did not lead with spouses and fellow believers! Instead he launched into that rather shocking illustration of the good Samaritan in contrast to the priest and Levite. In light of such high standards, I have to admit that neither do I love my neighbor as myself, and while I\'m at it, I probably don\'t love God enough either, and that is why I need and accept Jesus as my Savior.

    • Reply by Susan on 2016-01-18 15:49:44

      I mean, the WT article, not Meleti's article. :-) How do you get back in to edit a post?

      • Reply by Meleti Vivlon on 2016-01-18 15:56:07

        I did it for you, but on the new sites, you will be able to do it for yourself. Sorry for the inconvenience, and thanks for the comment.

        • Reply by Susan on 2016-01-18 16:09:40

          Thanks!

  • Comment by Susan on 2016-01-18 20:26:38

    I too, looked at some stats regarding the work of translation and the WTS boasting availability in over 600 languages. This translation priority, however, has not been for the bible itself but rather their own literature which by nature becomes obsolete?
    This quote, from the Annual Meeting Report 2013
    "In 2005, the Governing Body gave increased attention to the need to translate the Bible into many languages. Since then, the number of languages in which the New World Translation is published has increased from 52 to 121, with work on 45 more languages now under way." https://www.jw.org/en/jehovahs-witnesses/activities/events/annual-meeting-report-2013/
    Meanwhile, as Meleti pointed out, Wycliffe Bible Translators founded in 1942, as well as the United Bible Societies (societies working together since 1946) have complete bible translations in at least 451 languages, and the New Testament in about 1,185 languages.
    Oh, here's another WTS priority. "Sing to Jehovah" in 116 languages. https://www.jw.org/en/jehovahs-witnesses/activities/publishing/new-songbook/

  • Comment by Joseph Fenty on 2016-01-18 20:51:26

    Ostensibly, the scriptures bestow upon husbands headship in relation to his wife. The sole qualification for this role is justified by the presents of male genitals. He doesn't have to be smart, moral, physical able, coordinated, fast or strong, just male. Is this reasonable?
    There are many other scriptures that denigrate women. Consider the Lev 21:9 (burn to death for fornication ); Deuteronomy 25:11-12 (hands cut off for defending her husband); Leviticus 12 :8 (longer unclean period for giving birth to a girl); Judges 19:24-25 (Lot offers his daughter to the crowd to be raped), the obscene number of wives of Kings David and Solomon, many I imagine were young girls, the list goes on. Just as the bible looked kindly on the practice of slavery, but we in 2016 find this behavior repugnant, we must reject the notion that we, the husband, deserve headship. Brother you do not deserve it. You did absolutely nothing to earn that position. You wife deserves to be treated as your equal partner. She is just as important as you are, and you denigrate her by saying you are her head.

    • Reply by Father jack on 2016-01-19 03:37:37

      I thought meleti made a good point in his article though that all we are is a link in a chain of command . The real head of all is god . The idea is to follow him not any man ., by the way i do agree joseph but i think whats wrong is mans view of the term headship .

    • Reply by Meleti Vivlon on 2016-01-19 08:37:35

      First, let us not blame God for what Lot tried to do. In fact, the angels intervened to prevent that from happening. The injustices brought upon the fairer sex are the result of sin. We wanted to do things our way and we are living with the consequences. After 2,500 years of us doing things our way without much divine intervention, God began to make changes, starting with the introduction of the Mosaic covenant. However, the process is gradual due to our own hardheartedness; so allowances were made. (Mt 19:8) Slavery for instance was not God's purpose, nor was the inequality of the sexes. But it is our way as sinful humans. Slavery exists even today in lands claiming to follow the Christian course.
      After 1,500 years of the Mosaic law he has brought us even further along the path to redemption with the New Covenant.
      The role of headship is Scriptural. To deny it, is to deny God as our ruler. However, is it temporary? It is part of the process by which we will eventually be restored to grace?

      “But when all things will have been subjected to him, then the Son himself will also subject himself to the One who subjected all things to him, that God may be all things to everyone.” (1Co 15:28)

      There is no mention of Jesus as a head over the man back in the Garden of Eden. He became our head only in the Christian era, but that era is finite. It ends when the words of 1Co 15:28 are fulfilled. Will Jesus cease being our head then? Is that part of what it means when it says "that God may be all things to everyone"? If so, then would not the headship of the husband also cease? Is a different arrangement going to come into being when all humans are not only perfect, but perfected? Is the headship arrangement merely one more step in the process of reconciliation with God?
      I do not have the answers to these questions, but I don't need them because I have faith: Faith in the goodness of God to do all things right and to keep his promises.

    • Reply by Anonymous on 2016-01-19 12:52:35

      Jesus said if a man can make room for singleness then let him make room for it.
      Husbands who INSIST on headship in all things are abusing their mate.
      Wives who INSIST on having their way in all things are abusing their mate.
      We are all sinners who without a doubt will fail to be good husbands and wives throughout the trials that life brings. It is more loving, and wiser, for the husband to recognize and accept that his wife will not always be able to respect an imperfect head. Who among us can claim to continually respecting Christ's teachings by following him in all things, every time, and with full hearts and humility? How much less can a woman be expected to humbly follow a man who by his very nature is miserably imperfect and incapable of always knowing/doing what is best for his family.
      Respect and love must be earned.
      Young men and young women should give serious consideration to Jesus' words: let him/her that can make room for it, make room for it.
      If though marriage is what you choose, this also is fine. Remember love of neighbor should start with our closet neighbor, our closet brother or sister; our marriage mate.
      Joshua

      • Reply by Anonymous on 2016-01-19 14:14:22

        I would like to add this note to my JW brothers lurking here.
        Through the years there have been sisters who have sought my advice with a rather common marital situation in the congregation; the reluctance of brothers, or at times even refusal, to take the lead spiritually.
        If brothers do not have the time to study the Bible with their family, to walk side by side with their children in field service, to take the spiritual lead, then brothers, you have failed as a husband, a father, and disciple of Christ.
        My hands have been tied when approached by sisters struggling with believing husbands who speak on the platform and conduct studies with strangers but who do not take the spiritual lead at home. The situation was so bad with one elder's wife she felt compelled to leave him.
        Headship starts with PERSONALLY leading the family to Jehovah and Christ.
        Joshua

        • Reply by AndereStimme on 2016-01-19 14:37:35

          I think at least some of the brothers who struggle with "taking the lead" do so because of what 'taking the lead' means in JW thinking: Slogging through paragraph after paragraph of insipid, spoon-fed schlock that bores parents and children alike out of their skulls. It sure got easier for me when we started reading straight out of the Bible and simply applying the lessons. It's fast and effective, and in ten to fifteen minutes the kids are back at play with no complaining. Sometimes they even remind me that it's time for Bible study.

          • Reply by Anonymous on 2016-01-19 15:23:23

            Good job, brother.
            I sat in with two other brothers who were counseling a family I was close to. The wife said her husband, an elder, would not make time to study with the children or the Watchtower. He replied his elder duties came first and after work he needed to relax. I attempted to find some middle ground but alarmingly the other two brothers agreed with the husband saying they too did not have the time to study the Watchtower with the family, assigning that and other spiritual duties to their wives.
            This woman was dumbfounded. She afterward said, how can an elder say one thing on the platform but practice another? She ended up leaving both her husband and her religion.
            Brothers are taught to seek the limelight in the congregation at the expense of their families.
            The mass exodus of young people is in part due to the failure of fathers to lovingly lead their sons and daughters to Jehovah. Of course, the real blame lies with the Society because they have set the pattern. They have led in hypocrisy and in seeking the limelight.
            May Jehovah give them their just reward!
            Joshua

    • Reply by Vincent Gomez on 2016-01-20 21:39:42

      Joseph Fenty, you made a point of the Bible denigrating women. Since "all scripture is inspired of God", why do you think that is the case? What has your research shown? Also too, many in recent times have questioned the man's role by saying that. "The sole qualification for this role is justified by the presents of male genitals". The Bible does say the head of the woman is the man. Why? He is the man. He was created first. So in actuality, there is truth to what you said. It is simply the order. Their is nothing wrong with that, unless the husband is a jerk of course.

  • Comment by Eric Arthur Blair on 2016-01-19 05:01:36

    Another excellent article Meleti, thank you.
    I think the biggest problem with Watchtower is that their claim is so massive – that they are God’s organisation, the only true religion, hand picked by Jesus personally at the exclusion of all other religions (which are all Satanic) etc. etc. All of their teachings are skewed to uphold this claim first and foremost.
    It’s that claim which is their central and biggest lie, and they will reinforce it with more lies as well as beautiful truths when they get things right. And they will twist whatever they like, (including those same lies or truths,) to bolster that claim whenever it suits their purpose to do so. Everything they have got right and everything they have got wrong is all serving that lie – it doesn’t matter which – the lie comes first. They cherry pick whatever proofs they like, change anything they like along the way, and silence anybody who disagrees.
    And we know most of all, despite producing some good fruit, that most of their fruit does not support their claim.

  • Comment by Anonymous on 2016-01-19 13:18:00

    Thanks for the article, Meleti.
    Joshua

  • Comment by F J on 2016-01-19 13:28:07

    I pretty much agree joshua . Ive got to be honest there are times when ive acted like an idiot . I think that marraige is more of a partnership . A case of listening to one another and trying to be reasonable and making one another happy . Personally i think my wife talks an awful lot of sense shes a very clever person . I think if i had played the headship role to heavy handed it would have not worked .but as it is we have been together for over 30 years and are both happy . Father jack or should i say hubby jack

  • Comment by Buster on 2016-01-19 13:40:34

    I love how the Organization keeps throwing out numbers all the time, I remember about 5 months ago in a watchtower they had the same thing, of saying look at our Huge numbers, but what does that prove.....Nothing.
    When we look at this year, yearbook the baptism numbers are down, memorial attendance down, but people eating bread and drink the wine, but guess what in a few weeks ( actually in a month or two before the memorial) there will be a article in the watchtower saying how if you are really are annotated or even if you think you are , you ain't, and they try to putdown the huge increase in numbers of people partaking, why, cause Those number don't help them, so wait a minute people for believe they should partake and do, but really should not according to the Magnificent Seven, but they still count them, but they say the number don't reflect the truth, But you still count them..... Oh yeah the Truth.
    And what about all these things produced Watchtower produced, wow just a great number, that is why they are cutting back, once every two.months, and paged less and less, what about there bibles, the Whole Spanish Congregations have not gotten there New NWT bible ( still waiting that translation money ) why, heck if I know. Maybe they have to wait for a another Generation.
    Love to all
    buster

  • Comment by Buster on 2016-01-19 15:03:41

    Why don't they put a number count of Old Publications that are out dated, and Old Light....Cough Cough like the Revelation Book that recently got canned , I mean there was a whole list, I Wonder why they don't put that list in the Watchtower study, right, .......... They even took the Dates off the Watchtower's... Awesome.

  • Comment by Father jack on 2016-01-19 18:04:46

    Talk about qouting statistics to (prove ) they have gods blessing . One sister said to me . Come on 8 million people cant be wrong i replied but 900 million catholics can be though cant they .

  • Comment by Menrov on 2016-01-20 08:38:08

    In par. 3 I read this line: "Notice that Jesus placed love of neighbor second only to love of Jehovah". English is not my mother tongue but I believe this statement is incorrect as the 2 commands are equal in importance. The Love your neighbor is not second to.The Greek says that to love the Lord is the great and the first and the second is like that one.
    Further in par 3 it gives examples of who your neighbor is: marital partner, member in congregation and people you meet in field service. None of these fit the example given by Jesus. Very peculiar Luke 10:29 is not quoted. I guess it is because of what follows that verse as it shows that your neighbour is anyone.
    Regarding mariage and roles, I believe much is said already.
    Par 11: " Genuine love and unity identify Jehovah’s servants as the ones who practice the true religion, for Jesus said: “By this all will know that you are my disciples—if you have love among yourselves.” (John 13:34, 35) "
    Just to compare. In my country there are many refugees and this creates tension among the local communities and also on national scale. But there are many families who offered themselves as guest to provide housing to many of these refugees. Imagine, allowing people in your house that you do not know at all. Or these families that offer themselves as foster parents to help children and young people by providing them a house and family.
    True compasson for people they do not know, for people that cannot repay.

    • Reply by father jack on 2016-01-21 04:08:24

      On the point of gods love being first menrov think the watchtower try to make this point because it means that many then will put the needs of the organisation above the needs of any individual in the mind of the JWs this is what it translates to . However love of god and nieghbour are inseperably linked . Because to love god is to observe his commandments and the commandment he has given us is to have faith in his son and to love our nieghbour . . So there is no real distinction its only in the mind of the JW .

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